DUHRAM.
I often enjoy visiting the city of Durham armed with a back pack full of beers which I drink sat down by the river. Occasionally I buy a bunch of flowers from the Tesco there and hand them out to passing dog walkers. On one occasion I chucked a bunch at a mans face. Luckily he saw some funny side to this. I am more than aware of the fact I am overdue getting beaten up. In fact, after all the silly stuff I've managed to get away with, I won't even be annoyed or upset when it happens, it will be right for it to happen and I understand this.
Anyway, after one of my river drinking sessions in early 2015, I decided to pop into the Head of Steam. I sat down outside with my headphones in. To the left of me was a man and his dog. To the right was an elderly lady with a much younger man. These 3 people seemed to be engaged in quite a heated debate, but I was more interested in my music then whatever it was they were arguing about, so for quite some time I just enjoyed my beer, observing what was to me, a wordless argument.
After a short time my curiosity got the better of me. I took my headphones off and was surprised at the content of this argument. The man with the dog was gay, the older lady and the boy, who turned out to be mother and son, were homophobic. I was surprised to hear such remarks from them. It's not something I'd ever really witnessed directly. I couldn't help but get involved. The angle I went in at was to question the older lady. I said something along the lines of 'But you look so sweet and elegant, you look like you would have wisdom on your side?! Surely if anybody loves anybody it's ok?!' Though drunk, I do still remember inwardly cringing when I mentioned wisdom. I just thought she must think I'm calling her old.
The guy with his dog was really good about it all really. This must be an argument that goes on often there. He lent over and touched my arm saying 'Ahh don't worry about it mate. They're here all the time. They'll never learn.'
I was still shocked. I tried asking the son about it. He was laughing as he answered, saying it's just not right. The mother and son seemed completely eccentric. Laughing the whole time and saying some really nasty sentences. The man and his dog carried on with the argument but I felt out of my depth. It may have been ignorant and not very admirable of me to not carry on fighting the good fight, but I admit I put my headphones back in and just petted the mans dog occasionally. A lovely terrier.
Fast forward a couple of months. I'm back sat down by the river in Durham, it was a lovely night with the sun in the sky till about 8 if I remember right. I'd handed out flowers and was feeling great. I headed towards the Head of Steam feeling a little giddy. On the street outside the bar was an attractive girl looking as if she had just finished work. I thought I had nothing to lose, so I asked her if she fancied a drink. She said no at first but she said it with a shy smile. I said to her 'Oh come on, how interesting will it be! We've never met each other! Let's find out all about each other over the space of one drink! Then we'll never see each other again!' Crazily enough she looked in at the bar, then at me. 'I have no idea why I'm thinking I might actually say yes to this' she said. 'Yesssss!' I said, 'That's amazing! Come on, one drink' ....'Ok but only a coke, my housemate will be wondering where I am' she said.
At the bar I ordered a pint of lager and got her a coke. I asked her where she worked and explained how I understood this was completely crazy, and I was a bit drunk, but I was completely harmless. I think I may have told her I'd been sat down by the river handing out flowers to dog walkers earlier?!
After receiving the drinks I lead us outside explaining how it is a nice warm evening and we should make the most of it. I was walking ahead of her looking back as I talked. As we came outside, who was sat there but my two old homophobic acquaintances. The problem was, I was drunk. I'd completely forgotten which xenophobic tendencies this mother and son duo possessed. I got confused and thought it was racism. I was so sure I was right.
As we passed the old lady, I looked back at my new female friend, then at the old lady, pointed at her and said 'She's completely racist this old lady'...in a strange way I was surprised this scenario should present itself, so in the split second between pointing her out and taking my seat all I could think was how strange this was all most likely going to be. When I turned around to see my new female friends reaction, I realised she'd completely frozen still, stood staring at me completely gob smacked, holding her coke out unable to move! The gravity of the situation suddenly hit me. To this girl, who knew nothing of all this, I'd just pointed at a little old innocent looking lady and accused her of being a racist. I tried to explain 'No really! She actually is! Her and her son!' I pointed at him.
Straight away the mother and son looked shocked but with massive eccentric smiles on their faces. The son was the first to defend themselves, 'We are not racists?! Wherever did you get that from?!' I was so so confused. I was sure they were. All I could think to say was 'But you are?! I saw you....' By this time the young girl was shaking her head in disbelief. She put the coke down on the table in front of me. 'I'm going to go', she said. I didn't blame her. Anybody in her position would feel very awkward I'm sure. She quickly left without saying bye. I just looked at the mother and son completely confused myself. Moments passed before the son realised who I was. 'Oh you were here a couple of months ago! When the gay fellow was here drinking next to you!'
It all came back to me. Ridiculous. What could I do but smile?! 'That's it!' I said. 'You're homophobic! Shittttt I knew it was one of the two!' I said. Then we chatted for a while. The whole time just discussing how they find it so difficult to be ok with the idea of members of the same sex being in love with each other.
I often enjoy visiting the city of Durham armed with a back pack full of beers which I drink sat down by the river. Occasionally I buy a bunch of flowers from the Tesco there and hand them out to passing dog walkers. On one occasion I chucked a bunch at a mans face. Luckily he saw some funny side to this. I am more than aware of the fact I am overdue getting beaten up. In fact, after all the silly stuff I've managed to get away with, I won't even be annoyed or upset when it happens, it will be right for it to happen and I understand this.
Anyway, after one of my river drinking sessions in early 2015, I decided to pop into the Head of Steam. I sat down outside with my headphones in. To the left of me was a man and his dog. To the right was an elderly lady with a much younger man. These 3 people seemed to be engaged in quite a heated debate, but I was more interested in my music then whatever it was they were arguing about, so for quite some time I just enjoyed my beer, observing what was to me, a wordless argument.
After a short time my curiosity got the better of me. I took my headphones off and was surprised at the content of this argument. The man with the dog was gay, the older lady and the boy, who turned out to be mother and son, were homophobic. I was surprised to hear such remarks from them. It's not something I'd ever really witnessed directly. I couldn't help but get involved. The angle I went in at was to question the older lady. I said something along the lines of 'But you look so sweet and elegant, you look like you would have wisdom on your side?! Surely if anybody loves anybody it's ok?!' Though drunk, I do still remember inwardly cringing when I mentioned wisdom. I just thought she must think I'm calling her old.
The guy with his dog was really good about it all really. This must be an argument that goes on often there. He lent over and touched my arm saying 'Ahh don't worry about it mate. They're here all the time. They'll never learn.'
I was still shocked. I tried asking the son about it. He was laughing as he answered, saying it's just not right. The mother and son seemed completely eccentric. Laughing the whole time and saying some really nasty sentences. The man and his dog carried on with the argument but I felt out of my depth. It may have been ignorant and not very admirable of me to not carry on fighting the good fight, but I admit I put my headphones back in and just petted the mans dog occasionally. A lovely terrier.
Fast forward a couple of months. I'm back sat down by the river in Durham, it was a lovely night with the sun in the sky till about 8 if I remember right. I'd handed out flowers and was feeling great. I headed towards the Head of Steam feeling a little giddy. On the street outside the bar was an attractive girl looking as if she had just finished work. I thought I had nothing to lose, so I asked her if she fancied a drink. She said no at first but she said it with a shy smile. I said to her 'Oh come on, how interesting will it be! We've never met each other! Let's find out all about each other over the space of one drink! Then we'll never see each other again!' Crazily enough she looked in at the bar, then at me. 'I have no idea why I'm thinking I might actually say yes to this' she said. 'Yesssss!' I said, 'That's amazing! Come on, one drink' ....'Ok but only a coke, my housemate will be wondering where I am' she said.
At the bar I ordered a pint of lager and got her a coke. I asked her where she worked and explained how I understood this was completely crazy, and I was a bit drunk, but I was completely harmless. I think I may have told her I'd been sat down by the river handing out flowers to dog walkers earlier?!
After receiving the drinks I lead us outside explaining how it is a nice warm evening and we should make the most of it. I was walking ahead of her looking back as I talked. As we came outside, who was sat there but my two old homophobic acquaintances. The problem was, I was drunk. I'd completely forgotten which xenophobic tendencies this mother and son duo possessed. I got confused and thought it was racism. I was so sure I was right.
As we passed the old lady, I looked back at my new female friend, then at the old lady, pointed at her and said 'She's completely racist this old lady'...in a strange way I was surprised this scenario should present itself, so in the split second between pointing her out and taking my seat all I could think was how strange this was all most likely going to be. When I turned around to see my new female friends reaction, I realised she'd completely frozen still, stood staring at me completely gob smacked, holding her coke out unable to move! The gravity of the situation suddenly hit me. To this girl, who knew nothing of all this, I'd just pointed at a little old innocent looking lady and accused her of being a racist. I tried to explain 'No really! She actually is! Her and her son!' I pointed at him.
Straight away the mother and son looked shocked but with massive eccentric smiles on their faces. The son was the first to defend themselves, 'We are not racists?! Wherever did you get that from?!' I was so so confused. I was sure they were. All I could think to say was 'But you are?! I saw you....' By this time the young girl was shaking her head in disbelief. She put the coke down on the table in front of me. 'I'm going to go', she said. I didn't blame her. Anybody in her position would feel very awkward I'm sure. She quickly left without saying bye. I just looked at the mother and son completely confused myself. Moments passed before the son realised who I was. 'Oh you were here a couple of months ago! When the gay fellow was here drinking next to you!'
It all came back to me. Ridiculous. What could I do but smile?! 'That's it!' I said. 'You're homophobic! Shittttt I knew it was one of the two!' I said. Then we chatted for a while. The whole time just discussing how they find it so difficult to be ok with the idea of members of the same sex being in love with each other.
